On the questionnaire for my treatment system ‘Chakrosanct’, one question clients are asked is “can you love unconditionally?” Even though this is just a simple yes or no answer it is the most struggled upon question within the whole questionnaire (and there are 49 questions on there). This got me wondering why?
In what situation are we most struggling to love unconditionally and what does it really mean?
The definition of unconditional love is:
To love no matter what, under all circumstances and without conditions.
So, that means to give love regardless of love given in return, even if we feel mistreated or repulsed by another’s actions or words. WELL, that’s why it’s a struggle! It doesn’t come naturally to many of us to shower someone with love when they have just made us feel bad. In fact, it is quite possibly a natural reaction to defend ourselves with something forceful and sometimes unpleasant.
So, why is unconditional love so important and actually pretty powerful?
Because, only through unconditional love towards ourselves and others can we open up to receiving this love. Living without unconditional love encourages judgement and criticism of the outer world which can only reflect back to us. Bringing more judgement and criticism our way.
If you can learn to accept and love all that is for what it is then there can be no resistance or barriers in your way. To open your heart is to welcome a world full of change, opportunity and most importantly, lessons to learn
So, next time you find yourself putting up boundaries or attacking someone for their behaviour, try dealing with it differently. Try saying something positive and loving where you would normally criticise or negate.
The biggest difference you will notice is how YOU feel. None of us really enjoy putting others down, it is just a rather reactive self-sabotaging defence mechanism that we could all do without.
As always, I love hearing your thoughts, tips and experiences so feel free to join in the conversation by leaving a comment below. It is great to build up a dialogue and support for readers.
Lashings of love without condition,
Ps. Do you have a topic or question that you would like to see discussed on this blog? If so, email me at firstname.lastname@example.org or leave a comment below.